So if everything is approved I only have 3 weeks left until its back to the work grind and my new baby boy starts daycare. It looks like I may be getting him into the daycare at work and eventually River will move over there as well. I hope they like it. I really like kindercare and its killing me to take her out of it but with 2 kids we just can't afford it and the work daycare is half the cost... so what we were paying for River would cover River and Bennett. Otherwise I would need a second job and then care for my babies for that job too... its a never ending psycho cycle.
At least I know this won't be my life forever. Everything changes I just want to be able to enjoy my kids and been able to do things with them before they get older and start with the attitudes and Joe and I develop into "embarassing parents" and then they will move away etc. And my little Bennett is getting so big so fast and he is our last baby and I just love snuggling with him! River won't snuggle right now... maybe 2 year olds don't or its just her or she is just too independent for that... which is cool and all but it makes me think about how baby snuggle time passes by so fast!
And then there's all the other life things happening... I'm way overweight after having 2 babies in 2/3 years... I need to find clothes that fit for my corporate world job... I need to start planning our wedding if we are ever going to have one... (I will have a wedding! I know I've done everything backwards but I will have a wedding or I won't consider myself married and I want to be my normal size again when I do)
My life is very different now than it was or will be. It has to when your kids are this young. In the next 5 years I should be singing barbershop again, swing dancing again, maybe doing a little bit of martial arts again, being social again, etc but I will also add to my rep playing with my kids, going on family trips, having family movie nights and things like that... a lot to look forward to and a lot to bring back into my life.. my passionate things, the things that make my heart sing and my body go into a natural high. I miss those things. I just hope I will be able to do them and enjoy them. Now I know I will always be able to sing but I am a bit worried about the physical things I used to be able to do and my now increasing age... and of course I need to get my weight back down or my joints are going to scream at me.
Well thats probably enough rambling for tonight. I hope Saturday is rockin for you!